Text of t-shirt front:
Top Ten Reasons Why Quantum is Better Than Statmech

10. Only Dennis can sleep late enough to still be in bed during quantum. The rest of us just skip.
9. Pi is pretty much one. Or was that two? Whatever.
8. Jiang does Puneet's problem sets
7. Bob is thermodynamically large
6. Experiments with the entangled, two-body, particle in a box problem
5. Problem sets aren't due until solutions are posted. And then they are still not due.
4. Bob will bet you his Nobel Prize money against your first born child that quantum computers will never work.
3. We give him beer, we get answers
2. Final? What final?
1. If it weren't for our communist TA, Laughlin would have taught us how to build nuclear weapons long ago.


Think of this thing as a giant vector from Hell -Laughlin

I think that I will just give everyone good grades. -Laughlin

Marc, were you sleeping? -Laughlin
No, but I will be. -Marc

"C-" all around! -Ray

If electrons were tensors, then horses could fly. -Laughlin

I'm right, and you're wrong. -Laughlin

Those fucking mathematicians, they want to prove things in physics. How silly. -Jiang

I thought, I thought, I thought my head off. -Jiang

I have an uncontrollable urge to take the dot product. -Laughlin

Did you see the South Park Movie? I learned all of my English from it. -Jiang

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Text of t-shirt back:
Top Ten Reasons Why Statmech is Better Than Quantum

10. The problems are solvable (usually)
9. Haven't you always wanted to know whether the degeneracy pressure of an n-dimensional neutron star will keep it from collapsing?
8. Willick is a very effective alarm clock
7. Eva is thermodynamically small
6. Maxwell's Mother
5. Walking to class through Gates, you might accidentally get a job
4. Puneet brings us cookies
3. Renormalization groupies
2. A textbook from 1965 is better than no book at all
1. All the quantum I need to know, I learned from statmech.

I was going to TA for Reif, but then they told me he was dead. -Willick

I will fill a building with angry psychopaths. -Dave
We already have a Math Department. -Nelia

Almost all of you took physics 70 from me because Nikhil isn't here, that little...... -Willick

I've never been stopped before by a lack of wisdom. -Willick

Luckily, nothing that I say matters. -Willick

And then I began to have second thoughts... -Willick

Don't fall asleap Tom, this is the key point. -Willick

Obviously, I don't know what you are talking about. -Silverstein

Don't eat me! Don't eat me! -Nelia's Gummy Worm

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